SANCTUARY

The Diary; Aku Ingin

Aku Ingin

I wish

by Sapardi Djoko Damono

Aku ingin mencintaimu dengan sederhana....

I wish to love you in a simple way...

Dengan kata yang tak sempat diucapkan kayu,

with all the unsaid words from the woods,

kepada api yang menjadikannya abu...

to the fire that burnt it to ashes...

Aku ingin mencintaimu dengan sederhana....

I wish to love you in a simple way...

Dengan isyarat yang tak sempat disampaikan awan,

with all the unsent signs from the clouds,

kepada hujan yang menjadikannya tiada....

to the rain that drove it to emptiness....

[taken from "Cinta Dalam Sepotong Roti", a movie by Garin Nugroho]

The Diary; Cintai Diriku... [Love Me]

CINTAI DIRIKU

[Love Me]

taken from a song by Reza

Cintai diriku seperti aku mencintaimu....

love me like I love you...

Sepenuh jiwaku...

truly wholeheartedly...

Jangan pernah ada tersimpan prasangka....

never keep any doubts...

Di pelukmu 'ku sandarkan seluruh hidupku....

I lay my whole life in you arms....

dan tak'kan terbagi....

and I will not ever turn away from you....

Percayalah, cintaku hanya untukmu....

trust me, my love is for you and for you only...

It's September already. Rain pours every day and every day without him is a painfull moment. When the clock is heading to late afternoon hour, the sky begins to darken and greyish clouds start to gather.

I look out my window and watch as the rain drops on the roof outside my window. Somehow, I love watching every drop of the water falling from the deep dark grey sky above. I feel like I can see him in every single drop of the rain. Missing him is not the biggest burden, I can handle it. Loving him is easy, because he is so lovable. It's just a dark shadow behind him that always caught in my eyes. Tailing him wherever he goes. Nothing I can do about it. Everyone has a dark side. I just have to deal with it, whatever it takes.

No one knows how scared I was inside to let him into my life. A complete stranger. Someone that I don't know of. But the chemistry is just so damn strong! Chemistry that never happened before. It's against all my principles and beliefs. But then I thought this is just the way of my life should go. So, be it.

[what a moody day! i don't even know what i'm writing!]